you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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