I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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