Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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