bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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