I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
