I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
