Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Randomize
