It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
