That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
