I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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