Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
