i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
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