I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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