I didn't shave. On purpose
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
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