physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
