I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize