My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Randomize
