I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize