Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
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