so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
