This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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