is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
