I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
