just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
