i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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