Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
