my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
