friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize