Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I think i got beer on your cat.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
