I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I skipped work to stalk him.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Randomize