i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
