dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
