I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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