I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
As shirtless as possible
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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