Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
