You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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