Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I would ride that face into the sunset
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
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