Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
