It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
