Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
