Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
