"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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