he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize