You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize