So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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