its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize