if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
