i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
