How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
