we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
