Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
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